What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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