I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
