i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I cut my penus on the lid.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
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