I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
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you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
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You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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