I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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