and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
i permit you to call me
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Send help, water and tortillas.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
