Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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