Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I intend to get homeless drunk
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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