Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
