i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
