I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
