i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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