I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
