we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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