I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize