So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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