He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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