what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
