She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
splinters make it hard to masturbate
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
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