think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
