Screwed.edu
Its about making memories worth repressing
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
