We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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