Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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