I wish life had little blips of pornography
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
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