I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
