I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
