garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize
