When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
