Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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