I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
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