Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
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