I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
they call him Oral-B. enough said
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
