Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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