i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
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