We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
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Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
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She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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