You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
