Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
