a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize
