No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
