i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
