Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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