she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
