I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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