Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
