She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
