I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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