it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
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She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
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Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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