Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
