How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
