Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Randomize